Friday, 3 April 2015

Happiness (1)

Happiness (1)

          On this day of happiness she took a long last look at the golden beach, a prayer of breath and beauty, but she could feel the song in her heart calling her home to the new green of springtime: the equinox beckoned, all spunk and spikyness.
         This trip had been a longed for hope, this time to breathe a different air away from the crinoline creases of a restricted home life. She had explored the crenellations of the old town market, the fort with a bazaar heart, it's sellers prone to fabrication and exaggeration, and been filled with the joy of it.
          Now she must leave the open air fun of it and find equal joy in a more regular pace. Look for the simple pleasures hidden within the kernel of everyday, stirring a bowl of frozen peas.
         As Bella mounted the bus for the airport the sun turned it's cloud cheek to the eclipse and she saw a crazy dog chasing it's tale. This is where I came from she thinks but I am coming through my transformation. I have shed the laces of my corset that held in all manner of harm, poisoning my core and I can return, glowing, peaceful and at one with myself. The yoga and meditation travel with me to my final destination offering a permanent sanctuary and I will become as bendable on the outside as I can be malleable on the inside. I am equal to the task and well equipped.
          Bella took her seat as the bus pulled away from the stop in a cloud of diesel, accelerating impatiently. At the back of the bus a less serene tourist dealt her fretting child a short sharp slap.

Happiness (2)


At the back of the bus a less than serene tourist dealt her fretting child a short sharp slap and Bertram Bombadier looks up from the road shocked at the sudden shrill cry of the child. The crazy dog runs into the road to avoid the bus now driving towards the precinct just as Bertrum  looks up and corrects his mistake adjusting his trajectory and jarring his wheel in a deep pothole. The bus hovers momentarily on one on axle then turns creaking onto it's side grinding along the road's surface with stubborn determination towards the pavement and the shocked by standing shoppers.
As in all such moments as these there is a moment when time seems to forget herself and stands still in a daydream state. A butterfly flaps its wings against the purple buddleia of the advertisement for the Botanic Gardens. The butterfly is unaffected by the bus's fight against gravity being airborne but it too comes to an end as Bertrum's tiffin box is dislodged from the locker above his head and guillotines one wing from the insect's body.
The diesel spilling into the road soon flares in a flint spark lighting the windows to sunset orange flowers. The clamouring passengers make their escape through windows wreathed in black fumes as Bertrum's cries at the loss of his job, his home, his wife and children. This is a catastrophe with far reaching consequences. It is then that he notices the girl with the secret smile that got on at the last stop with her carpet bag lying half in the isle, unmoving.
Having been knocked unconscious by a watermelon flung out of its place in the luggage rack the first thing Bella knows is gaining consciousness waking in a simple room with white curtains billowing gently at the open window, grogginess holding her eyelids heavy a drip in one arm trickling endlessly. She raises her aching head cautiously, looking about the room, the sunlit silver edged wings of the birds flying into inky storm clouds at the window and a letter on the desk just out of reach.  It is a German stamp and her mother's hand. Relief flooded her as she slumped back on to the White crisp sheets.
She has no recollection of how she came to be here only the sense of a morphine enduced gypsy woman dancing through her dreams in a flowing dress singing "I am serenity" to the beat of her heart loud in her ears.
A nurse entered and took her temperature, her blood pressure. Bella gestured to the letter and was told
"Florence, your sister, she is coming now from Germany. We found your address in your Passport and contacted next of kin."
Why did the nurse tell her that her sister's name was Florence? Did they think she had lost her memory? She wondered idly whether her sister still carried the stone in her shoe as penance against the sin of her unfaithfulness. Would she never forgive herself this one indiscretion? After all, it was Gregor who had cheated so many times before and he did not seem to feel the need to punish himself, nor indeed excuse his behaviour. Maybe this would be good for Florence, to get away and learn there are many ways to be faithful that having nothing to do with fidelity.
A handsome young Doctor entered the room unaware that his looks would be responsible for raising the heart rate of many of his patients. Bella sat up a little, shaking herself into better consciousness and read his name tag, John Anderson, and a small Swedish flag. She looked at him appreciating his serious face and smiling eyes. Boy would she have enjoyed a secret liaison with him. He enquires as to how she was feeling
"Did you have a good sleep? Don't worry about the swelling, it will go down in time." He had the most endearing lisp and a delicious accent that made her think of spiced warm milk for some reason. What a joy it would be to be held dear in those knowledgeable eyes, in those expert hands. What heaven would be discovered on that day of happiness.  

For Those in Peril on the Sea

         In the depths of the sea no wind can stir the silt into a tornado that greedily absorbs the colour and shape of everything and yet the surface boils with turbulence. The sea is a restless sleeper, always rolling over and back, never settling. It is dressed with flashes of colour from myriad fish and phosphorescence flares from the deep like a water born aurora. Waters flow endlessly around the earth in rhythm with the planets dance which can be rough and threatening, stealing life, drowning men, and yet she has a lullaby to sing when she is calm.
        The fishing boats ply their trade year after year and the seasoned sailors know never to turn their backs on the sea lest it turns on them in an unexpected swell, swilling them from the deck in a salt spray slide. But when their work is done they allow themselves to be soothed by her song until they stay, subdued, in her far reaching embrace for the night.
      The men on board, starved for the softness of a lover's touch dream dreams of mermaids rising on silvered tales from the depths to hold them and pull them deeply, into their rocking arms, their swollen bosom, their ripe mouths. The seasoned sailors warn them over cocoa,
       "They will come to you in vulnerable sleep, Beware the shimmering comeliness of a mermaid's beauty their welcome is not what it seems. Fish must eat too and no curlews' call can reach you beneath the waves, no wondering albatross, a year on the wing, will see your path and send rescue. You are at the mercy of bliss. Should you give in to your desires and kiss the sea witch in return you are sure to taste salt tears. The dream would fold in on itself, collapse,a shout for help would bring you no aid. You are beneath the waves. Open your mouth and shout " I am in need of help" and you are doomed. There is no ladder back to the stars and you will be called forever to the billowy kelp gardens in the deep-dark. No. Better to enjoy the gifts of the dream and leave when they are done toying with you following bubbles to surface from sleep. Ask no more of the silken purse of nights' velvet sky but to deliver you safe to the 'morrow. There are too many connotations to the incantations of the sea, enchanting though they may seem. Do not trust the softness of the mermaids in your dreams it is insubstantial as a cloud. A man? A man can afford to be completely shameless in his dreams, he is blameless and can return to shore unsullied to enjoy his palpable pleasures."
       Wave farewell to the mermaid then as she flicks foam with her tail and slides from her rock at dawn  disappearing into the crest of a folding wave. They are freed now of the uncertainty of dreams.
      "Shake of the night and let loose the nets one more time, men. Let's fill the hold with the sea's  bounty and make our way home to the protective strong arms of the harbour to find a softer bed. The trestle tables are waiting to be laden with our treasure, dressed in their finest white damask gowns.